


resolution

by mardia



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, New Year's Resolutions, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-20
Updated: 2019-01-20
Packaged: 2019-10-13 03:12:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,498
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17480120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mardia/pseuds/mardia
Summary: Zack's forehead is wrinkled as he tries to work this out. "Okay, but--wait. You know you can just...not keep your New Year’s resolution, right?”"No," Ryan says mournfully. "No, I'm gonna."Zack lets out a half-disbelieving laugh. "What the--dude,why?"





	resolution

**Author's Note:**

  * For [duckgirlie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/duckgirlie/gifts).



> Written for duckgirlie, who left a prompt on tumblr requesting a BFU fic about New Year's resolutions that resulted in me FINALLY finishing a BFU fic. Thanks to angelsaves for reading this over and reassuring me it didn't suck and to just post the damn thing already. 
> 
> (Fic is archive-locked just because I have a policy of locking all of my RPF fic, not because of the particular content IN the fic, just FYI.)

Ryan wakes up on the first day of the year 2019 with a knot in his stomach and a sense of dread that has absolutely nothing to do with the amount of alcohol he had last night. 

“Ughhhhhh,” he groans, pressing the heels of his hands into his eyeballs, wishing that would help with his headache--or the anxiety churning in his stomach. “God, why do I do this to myself?”

The question is mostly rhetorical, since Ryan hadn’t actually had enough alcohol to black out--he’s well past his frat days there, an adult with a full time job and responsibilities and enough sense to keep from getting too wild now that he’s approaching thirty. But apparently he still doesn’t have enough sense to keep from committing to that stupid, irresponsible, idiotic New Year’s resolution--

Still groaning, Ryan rolls over and pushes himself out of bed, a hand still pressed to his aching forehead. First step is to get some aspirin and some water. Then he can deal with dragging himself into the shower. 

*

Ryan’s first day at work would be a pretty normal one, if only he was less of an emotional wreck. 

After the third baffled look Shane gives him, Ryan manages to escape to the voiceover booth, where he fumbles the same sentence three times in a row before getting himself together. He’s finally got into a good groove when there’s a gentle rapping at the door. 

Ryan takes his headphones off and cracks the door open to see Shane there, with an impending sense of doom as he takes in Shane’s henley and ruffled hair, hipster glasses perched on his nose.

“You okay, buddy?” Shane asks after about thirty seconds of silence. 

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Ryan says quickly. “Why?”

Shane gestures in the direction of Ryan’s face. “You’ve got a certain...wild-eyed, squirrely expression happening right now. It’s been happening all morning, actually.”

“Huh,” Ryan says, folding his arms over his chest in what he hopes is a casual and not at all suspicious or strange manner. “Weird. Anyway, I’m fine, nothing happening here. Aside from...voiceovers.”

Shane just tilts his head a little more, and then says, “Anyway, Devon’s starting the budget meeting in about ten minutes, so we should probably get going to that.”

“Right, cool, I’m there,” Ryan says, hastily grabbing his things. Shane politely waits for him to finish, and Ryan glances over his shoulder and something about the way the light is catching on Shane’s hair has his stomach lurching in a not-totally awful way, and with a sense of giving in to the inevitable, Ryan says, “Actually...are you free tonight?”

Shane blinks behind his glasses. “Yeah. Why?”

Ryan shrugs with one shoulder as he slips past Shane out of the booth. “Nothing, I just thought we could hang out at my place.”

He can feel Shane’s eyes on the back of his head as they head off to the conference room, but thank God, Shane doesn’t push it, just saying, “Yeah, that sounds good, I’ll be there.”

“Great, that’s just...super,” Ryan says, and then immediately wants to sink through the floor. 

“Super?” Shane echoes in disbelief, but thank God, they’re at the conference room and Ryan’s throwing the glass door open with more enthusiasm than what’s needed, causing Devon, already sitting at the table, to jump in her chair, startled. 

“Sorry,” Ryan says sheepishly, Shane snickering behind him, and he goes to take a seat. 

*

Thank God, Ryan has the excuse of going out to lunch to catch up with Zack Evans, and can escape the office before he makes a bigger idiot of himself. 

Once they’ve gotten their food from one of the best taco trucks in LA, Zack finally remarks, around a mouthful of fish taco, "Dude, are you okay? You've been scowling at that plate of tacos like it's going to give you indigestion.”

"It's nothing," Ryan says, but Zack's eyebrows are so high they're nearly meeting his coiff of blond hair, and Ryan sighs, tugging the brim of his hat a little lower as he admits. "I did a dumb thing."

"Well, that's normal for you," Zack jokes, but when Ryan doesn't laugh it off his face grows more concerned. "For real, Ryan, are you okay?"

Ryan groans and scrubs his free hand over his face. "I'm fine, I just made a New Year's resolution and now I have to _keep_ it," he says, in the tone of describing a great tragedy, which this absolutely is. 

"Wait, what?"

"I was drunk on New Year's, and I decided to make a resolution to ask out someone I’ve got a thing for," Ryan says, because Zack's a good buddy but he'd really like to keep this particular type of stupidity to himself--well, and to Shane, but that can't be helped. "And then I got _more_ drunk and I woke up on January 1st with a hangover and a resolution I'm stuck trying to keep."

Zack's forehead is wrinkled as he tries to work this out. "Okay, but--wait. You know you can just...not keep your New Year’s resolution, right?”

"No," Ryan says mournfully. "No, I'm gonna."

Zack lets out a half-disbelieving laugh. "What the--dude, _why_?"

Because he's spent the last two months, since realizing that he has a thing for Shane, slowly obsessing more and more about it until just the sight of Shane's hands moving through the air has him breaking out into a sweat. Just today during the budget meeting, it took all of Ryan's focus not to start obsessing over the way that Shane's henley showed off the hollow of his throat. He's having dreams about making out with Shane on the Unsolved set, for God’s sake. 

Ryan's got to settle this, so it'll be _done_ , and he can finally move the fuck on and stop being this giant fucking weirdo obsessing over his best friend. Because the only thing worse than doing this is feeling the constant anxiety over not doing this.

"I know I don't have to do this,” Ryan says finally. “The point is that I need to. I'll get it done, and then it'll be over, and I can move on and stop--stop freaking out about it all the time."

Zack's quiet for a moment. "Bold move, man," he says finally. 

"Thanks," Ryan says, wishing Zack's approval made him feel better about his choices.

"You could probably even get a whole video out of it," Zack offers up next. 

Ryan snorts. "Doesn't really fit the new channel's vibe."

"At least spin an article out of it," Zack advises. "Get those sweet, sweet clicks and ad views."

"Not so sweet these days," Ryan points out, but he can see the title spooling out in his head, in Buzzfeed's bold red text: _Five Reasons To Stick To Your New Year's Resolution, Or Die of Crippling Anxiety._

*

After he gets back from his lunch with Zack, Ryan hopes to slip back to his desk without anyone noticing. Shane’s got his giant headphones in, but just as Ryan’s slowly sliding into his seat, Shane lifts his headphones up and asks, glancing over, “How was lunch?”

“Good,” Ryan says quickly. “Tacos were tasty, Zack’s doing good, it was great.”

“Good,” Shane says. “You seem a little more...settled now.”

“I wasn’t settled before?” Ryan asks, defensive. 

“No, you were squirrelly before,” Shane says, matter-of-fact. “And you’re getting that way again.”

Ryan forces himself to exhale and bring his shoulders down so that they’re no longer right up around his ears. “Sorry. It’s, uh, weird being back from vacation after a month away.”

“Yeah, it’s weird having you back,” Shane says, then frowns. “Wait, that didn’t come out right. I meant that it’s nice having you back.”

“Oh?” Ryan says, his traitorous heart starting to speed up, or at least it feels that way. “Did you miss me?”

Shane makes a face. “Well, you know. It was strange being surrounded by people who know how black holes work, or who don’t lecture me about lizard people secretly roaming the planet in disguise.”

Ryan falls back into their usual banter, though with a strange mix of relief and disappointment. “Oh, come on, I haven’t talked to you about that in _forever_ \--”

“Some things,” Shane says solemnly, “are seared into the brain for all time.”

“Your face has seared my brain,” Ryan shoots back without thinking, and then his brain catches up with his mouth, and oh great, now his entire face feels like it’s on fire.

Shane winks at him, roguish and charming and making everything nine million times worse. “Right back atcha, buddy,” he says, grinning, and Ryan just groans theatrically as he turns back to his computer, ready to give up the last word if it means his mouth will stop running away with him. 

Right, okay. He’s dealing with this. Staring blindly at his screen, Ryan forces himself to ask, “We’re still on for hanging out later tonight, right?”

Shane pauses for a moment before responding. “Yeah, for sure.” Another brief pause before Shane asks, too-casually, “Is this about anything in particular, or is it another popcorn and movie night?”

Is Ryan sweating? It feels like he’s sweating. “Popcorn and movies are definitely on the schedule,” he says, but the guilty twinge low in his stomach has him adding, “And I kind of wanted to talk to you about something too.”

“Okay,” Shane says, slowly. “Uh. Everything’s okay, right?” His voice goes a little softer as he asks it, more concerned, and Ryan looks over to see Shane watching him earnestly, concern causing creases in his forehead. 

“Yeah,” Ryan says, feeling something tender and bruised starting to form in his chest. “Yeah, big guy, it’s fine.”

And it is going to be fine, Ryan’s determined of that. He might be all twisted up in his head about this stupid crush or whatever, but he’s also sure that when he tells Shane, Shane’s not going to make things worse. For all the glee he gets in teasing Ryan and trying to disprove the existence of anything supernatural, Shane is fundamentally a kind person. (It’s a big part of why the show works as well as it does.) 

Ryan believes, he has to believe, that even though Shane doesn't want him back (and God, doesn’t that suck to think about) that Shane won't be cruel about it. Shane’s a good guy, and Ryan’s an adult, and they’ll be fine.

“Okay,” Shane says, not sounding totally convinced. “Okay, then I’m there.”

“Cool,” Ryan says, and quickly grabs his headphones so that he can stop himself from digging this hole of awkwardness and poorly repressed feelings any deeper.

So it's settled. Tonight Ryan will keep his resolution, it'll go...however it goes, and one way or another it'll be _done_ and Ryan will finally move on.

It’ll be fine, eventually.

*

When Shane arrives at Ryan’s apartment that night, he comes with a six-pack of beer and a determined expression on his face. 

“Hey, buddy,” Ryan says, wiping his sweaty palms on his jeans as he steps aside to let Shane in. “I’ve got Netflix on already, popcorn’s already done, did you want--”

“Ryan, what’s going on?” Shane demands, cutting right to the chase without so much as a look at the full bowl of popcorn on the coffee table. “You’ve been acting weird all day, and this whole movie night has the feel of like, a last meal or something.”

Ryan’s mouth goes dry, but he still tries to brush it off. “No, man, this is just--”

“Are you quitting the show?” Shane asks, cutting him off. 

“What?” Ryan says, actually baffled. “No, dude, of course not.”

Shane does not look reassured. “Are you sick? Are you _dying_?”

“What--you think I’m dying?” Ryan yelps.

“I don’t know!” Shane insists. “Which is why I’m asking the question!”

“Oh my God,” Ryan groans, putting a hand over his face as he sits down into the couch, wishing he could just sink into the cushions and disappear. “Dude, I’m not dying, I’m not sick, I’m not leaving the show. I just...I needed to ask you something, and I couldn’t ask you at work. That’s it.”

He feels the couch dip as Shane settles down next to him. “Do you need a kidney?” Shane asks, serious, and Ryan finally lifts his hands away from his face to stare at him. 

“What the--didn’t I just say that I’m not dying? What the hell would I need your kidney _for?”_

“I don’t know!” Shane says defensively. “I figure it has to be something big if you’re actually worried about asking me, and that was the only thing that came to mind. What else could you ask for that you think I’d say no to?”

Ryan’s brain goes perfectly, absolutely blank. 

“Ryan?” Shane presses, after a long moment of silence. 

“Okay,” Ryan says, very quietly. “Just--uh. Remember that you said that, and if you hate what I’m about to do next, I can take it back, okay?”

And before Shane can ask him what that means, before Ryan can wimp out of it, Ryan leans forward and presses his mouth to Shane’s. His heart’s pounding so fast that he can’t even really take it in, not at first, not until Shane’s lips part and he starts kissing Ryan _back_ , slow and a little cautious, and then it’s like Ryan’s brain whites out and all he wants is more, all he wants is to keep _going_ and--

And it’s not until Shane’s fingers brush against the side of his face that Ryan comes back to himself, pulling back to blink at Shane in shock. 

Shane blinks right back at him, looking dazed, his face flushed and his mouth damp. 

“Uh,” Ryan says, mind still fuzzy. “That’s what I wanted to ask you.”

Shane is still just staring at him, normally sleepy eyes wide open, and then he blurts out, “Don’t.”

Ryan’s heart sinks, his hands and face going cold all of a sudden. “Don’t—“

“Don’t take it back. Ryan—Jesus, of course I don’t want you to take it back, do I _look_ stupid?”

A sense of giddiness is starting to wash over Ryan, rising up and over him in a wave, because holy shit holy shit, but he still manages to pull himself together to go for the easy opening, “Eh, a little,” he says, but he’s grinning too widely to really make the joke land. Shane pulls a face at him, and Ryan concedes next, his heart speeding up a little, “Good thing that I’m into that, though.”

The way that Shane’s smile grows at hearing this is incredible. “Yeah. Yeah, it is.” And then _he’s_ the one leaning in to kiss Ryan, and if this is the way the new year is going to start, Ryan’s going to be making resolutions on December 31st for the rest of his natural life.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [resolution [PODFIC]](https://archiveofourown.org/works/17482748) by [bessyboo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bessyboo/pseuds/bessyboo)




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